Oct 19: Response to 'anonymous'
Isn't it wonderful when people criticize you, of course in the guise of it being 'constructive', but won't even admit who they are? So, you insensitive twit:
Ever occur to you why it is so long between most postings? It's because I feel like crap. And when I feel that horrid all I can do is stay on the couch. I don't like complaining to people, and most don't like to hear it, especially day after day after day. My mother raised me with 'if you can't say something nice, don't say anything' policy. Apparently you weren't raised with the same manners.
All my TIME, EFFORT & MOTIVATION goes to working and basic household stuff. Have you ever been sick, even for a few days? Did you feel like doing anything? Bet not. But when that feeling goes on for months and years there isn't much of a choice, because things have to be done.
I took the increased dose of the methotrexate last night, I feel like absolute total crap. My friend Kimmy can take it without any problems, but it gives me major side effects. I can't take it any night before work, so this blows at least one weekend day. The left side of my face and eye are aching horribly, more swollen than usual. I'm very nauseated, but trying to keep down the nutritious breakfast needed to take the 8 other pills this morning, before the 5 that will come later on today. I want to curl up on the sofa with a bucket.
But today is farmer's market, so I dressed and drove there to get veggies and non-antibiotic meat. I put on the last pair of clean underwear to do so, now have to do laundry. Had to clean out the litter box, because the cats were indelicately dropping stool outside of it because it was so full. The place desperately needs to be vacuumed, but it won't get done. Kitchen table covered with stuff that needs to be coped with, won't get done. I take the bills out of the mail and throw the rest in a box for 'later'. My handyman is coming over to take out the three air conditioners, we haven't been able to get our schedules together for weeks to get this done, so it can't be put off. So, despite the fact that I just want to vomit there are things to move around, have to go out to the garage for the bag insulations stuff goes in and rearrange.
Yes, I'm typing this as I rest briefly. Because I type fairly quickly it only takes a few minutes. And I'm pissed that there are people like you who can read my saga and still be so stupidly insensitive.
So, here's my response: you clearly need to read my post again, although not all the '2,000 words' will be necessary. Concentrate on my descriptions of the TIME & EFFORT & MOTIVATION that it takes me to do daily activities, because you clearly are missing the point. My days and energy are spent doing the basics and, as you point out, it does take effort to keep in touch. But, as I detailed, my effort is going towards survival. What about that do you not get? Perhaps a reading comprehension course would assist you, because you clearly are not processing what you have read.
If you so desperately miss my voice, then you pick up the damn phone and call me. If I feel lousy I won't answer, but try to return calls within a day or two. If I can't talk, then I'll shoot a personal e-mail, but will probably refer you to my postings, because it's much easier for me to do this to keep people informed en masse than exert myself making individual phone calls with energy needed to get food.
Better yet, why don't you come over and help me? Maybe if I didn't have to cope with the mundane necessities that sap my TIME, EFFORT & MOTIVATION I'd have more energy to chat.
Laurie
2 Comments:
At 5:41 PM,
Anonymous said…
So as not to give a bad name to "anonymous", I will use the same. (:
First, reading someone's blog is not required reading on the internet.
Second, if anon could read at a reasonable rate of speed, it does really not take long to read 2,000 words. And if Laurie wants to express a lot to many people, it is really efficient to put down all the thoughts and feelings in one place for people interested.
Having known Laurie for about 35 years, I tend to pay attention to her thoughts.
At 2:38 AM,
Anonymous said…
**this is simple and I have said this to other not so nice posters in the past.
..WE asked Laurie to post/blog to let us help her vent, feel listened to and be heard but NOT judged.
..the end. her posts, if not liked, find another blog. or get of your JUDGING ass and help her out.
=======================
=======================
Laurie,
...stop wasting energy on defending your Choices. we all have opinions here and yes some are negative. but you waste to much time taking them personal. it is just an opinion move on.!
...clearly this is an old/past friend who is missing their old friend and is having issues coping with your current limitations and your current shitty new normal, and does not understand how someone can not look so ill but be dieing inside. mentally and/or physically. this is a coping issue on their side.
forget about this, this is just a glitch in someones coping.
ms.Deneen
Post a Comment
<< Home